Maud is… the name my oldest friends gave me about 20 years ago. I’ve always worked full time and also ‘acquired’ (what is the right term?) an additional carer role 10 years ago, as many of us do. Like other carers, I’m also an enthusiastic wife, mum, step mum, step-grandma, daughter, aunt and sister. I live in west Bucks in the UK.
Mum is… my mother-in-law Marj. Marj was born, raised, married, worked and lived in ‘the Potteries’ (Stoke on Trent) her whole life. With her husband Jack, she raised a son and a daughter. Despite living independently since Jack died, Marj started to need support. So Marj sold her house and joined my family and me in an annexe we built onto our house (see moving in together).
Marj has lived with us for over ten years now. A big fall and the progression of mixed vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s disease means nowadays Marj needs intense hands-on help. She gets this 24×7 from homecare assistants, my family and me.
A carer’s blog
My intention is to share what we’ve learned because we couldn’t easily find the information, perspective and help that could have prepared us all. In fact, I was (and still am) often bewildered and frustrated by the care ‘system’.
There’s no formal training for this new carer role you find yourself in and you probably didn’t apply for the job either. I hope to make things a heck of a lot easier for you. I’ll share the essentials and the things not to worry about, the pathways and short-cuts to support.
I am unashamed glass-half-full, as too often in the news caring, carers and the cared for are not presented positively. I hope the practical, financial and emotional support shared here means more time for fun, even post-Covid.
Finally, we’re all still learning, so we’d love to hear from you too.
If your close or ‘remote’ carer responsibilities are increasing and you want to know what might come next and where to find help, you can sign up for monthly-ish updates on the right hand side of any page. The Carers versus Covid page pulls together all the information you need right now and you can follow us @maudandmum on the socials too.